The Swiss red tape is tougher than gaffa

It was a terribly frustrating day.  As frustrating as nailing a painting on the wall only to be told it's crooked and waiting for Sachin's 100th hundred aaaaaand now his retirement. It started at 0645 hours when I left for the immigration to get re-entry visas for the boys and me. You see, nearly 3 months into our stay, we are still waiting for our permit Bs or residency permits. They are in the printing stage I'm told and apparently the guys there are flooded with work. Nothing to do with the tightening of swiss immigration laws then! At 8am I was given the cold shoulder by the receptionist aunty saying the boys need to be present as well even though we were told otherwise. Annoyed, I headed back home to release Heidi for work and then at 10am, I returned with little Seths. A 2 hour wait is painful. A 2 hour wait with 2 fidgety toddlers is a gazillion times worse. Luckily I have watched India lose often enough in recent years so I had experienced days of excruciating pain at a go.  The saving grace was the free WiFi so Tino was partially entertained. Finally our turn came only to find out that the visa required a picture of the boys which were to be snapped in another room which looked like a sterile dungeon. Tino was easy to persuade with candy but if you thought that taking a passport photo of a new born was tricky, taking one of an 18 month old is infinitely more difficult. Especially when the person in charge of pressing the button (he wasn't a photographer) is an arrogant idiot. I instantly knew he didnt have kids of his own. He was as gay as the blokes in modern family. I realize that the chaps in the TV series have an adopted child so my comparison doesn't really work. This gimbecile (gay+imbecile) was not only unhelpful, he was sarcastic about it. And not the funny kind either. He wanted Miro to sit up straight, look down the lens and hold his position. By now Miro was terrified and was screaming like he's about to get a jab at the doctors. Meanwhile the moron kept repeating, 'little bit down, to the left, head straight...oh! There's shadow!' I was fuming and told him to just snap the bloody picture. It was hard enough keeping Miro still. He told me 'No picture, no visa' and 'I can go get the swiss rules changed'. Eventually he said, this isn't working and to come back when the child's calmer. Not sure but by CHILD, he may have meant ME! So even the button pushers along with the receptionists in Switzerland have the authority to tell me to bugger off. Heidi came to the rescue and faced a similar scenario. Let's just say the gimbecile's sarcasm fell flat infront of the Finnish bluntness. As you can see, Miro's expressive in the visa says 'PISS-OFF'.

The following article on vodka saving 2 elephants did cheer me up -

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